Royal Dog Disaster

Queen Sydney was furious!

“What is that…that THING doing in my castle? Get it out of here!” barked the queen.

“You said you wanted a princess to play with. She is the one you ordered from the catalogue,” answered her loyal servant, Hildegard.

Queen Sydney poked the princess with her nose.

“Do you even have a name?” she asked the princess.

The princess lowered her head to the floor.

“Princess Clementine,” she growled.

The puppy pounced up, leapt in a circle, and raced out of the room.

“Princess Clementine, come here!” howled the queen. She and Hildegard ran after the puppy.

The princess galloped:

     over the red carpet,

          across the ballroom floor,

               around the courtyard,

                     and through the kitchen.

By the time they caught up, Princess Clementine had wolfed down,

“My food! You’ve eaten my entire bowl of doggie treats!” wailed the queen.

Again, the princess lowered her head to the floor.

“Hildegard, off with the puppy’s tail!” snarled Queen Sydney.

And again, the puppy pounced up, leapt in a circle, and raced out of the room. Queen Sydney and Hildegard followed:

through the kitchen,

     up the stairs,

          along the red carpet,

               and behind the throne.

Queen Sydney heard RIP! SCRATCH! POUND!

“My toys! You’ve chewed my favorite squeaky fluffy stuffed animal octopus!” yowled the queen.

The puppy lowered her head.

“Hildegard, bite that puppy’s neck!” gruffed Queen Sydney.

And again, the puppy pounced up, leapt in a circle, and raced out of the room. Queen Sydney and Hildegard followed:

around the throne,

     over a water dish,

          down some steps,

               and into the royal bedchambers.

 

Queen Sydney saw,

“My bed! You’ve destroyed my royal soft, lumpy, cushy doggie bed!” bayed Queen Sydney.

Queen Sydney and Hildegard snuggled on the remains of the doggie bed.  Princess Clementine nestled in beside them. Queen Sydney sniffed the rear end of the princess.

“Humphff!! You don’t even smell like a princess! What is that disgusting scent?” barked the queen.

“The humans made me take a bath before they would let me meet you,” whimpered the princess.

“Ah, yes, the humans. They have no respect for doggie odors,” yapped the queen.

The princess wagged her tail.

“Want to play?” asked Princess Clementine.

“Well, you do need to get rid of that nasty clean scent. Hildegard, guide us to the Royal Mud Pond at once!”

Hildegard pounced up, leapt in a circle, and raced out of the room. Queen Sydney and Princess Clementine followed:

past the Palace Guards,

          under the drawbridge,

                along the moat,

                               and in front of the mud pond.

SPLASH! CRASH! WHISH! Was heard through out the land.

Queen Sydney, Princess Clementine, and Hildegard pounced, leapt and raced in and out of the thick, yucky, gooey mud.

When they were covered in gunk, and smelled like wet dog fur, Queen Sydney ordered, “Hildegard, prepare the Royal Bones! We shall have a welcoming feast for Princess Clementine!”

“WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!” woofed the dogs.

Queen Sydney, Princess Clementine and Hildegard licked and sniffed and nipped. They raced away for a night of doggie fun.

Because that is what the queen ordered.

Reindeer Vacation

Santa’s reindeer disagreed on where to go for their yearly vacation. Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, and Donner wanted to go to a warm and sunny beach. But Blitzen had his heart set on seeing penguins in the South Pole.

“Snow, snow, snow. All we see is snow. We need warm beaches,” said the group.

“But penguins are the cutest animals ever!” said Blitzen.

Santa overheard them arguing. After telling him what the problem was, Santa lay his finger aside of his nose and laughed so hard his belly shook.

“But you can go to Brazil! They have penguins on the beach.”

The reindeer looked at each other.

“Um, okay, Santa, thanks for your input. We’ll just be going now,” said Dasher.

They sauntered away and Dancer said, “All those milk and cookies have gone to his head. He has gone totally crazy.”

“Penguins on a beach. Wow, where did he come up with such a silly idea?” said Prancer.

While they went to play reindeer games, Vixen snuck away to her computer. Within minutes she had made a discovery. She soared back to her friends.

“Listen up! Santa is right. There really are penguins on the beaches of Brazil.”

The reindeer looked at each other again.

“Then what are we waiting for? To Brazil it is!” said Comet.

Reindeer pack light, so they were ready to go the next morning. It was time for lunch when they came to a landing at a Brazilian beach.

“Sand is hot and gruffy on my hooves. I love it!” Cupid said.

The reindeer lay on their backs and scratched their fur in the sand.

“What are you doing?” cried Blitzen. “We have to find those penguins!”

“But we want to play first,” said Donner.

“Wheeze! Well, I am off to discover penguins,” said Blitzen.

And he stomped off to find the cute black and white birds.

Blitzen searched all along the coast. He looked in beach caves, galloped around meadows, and even flew over the nearest town. There were no penguins anywhere!

He slumped back to his friends.

As he rounded the bend, he could hear singing and laughter. And there to his wondering eyes did appear, seven reindeer and eight penguins!

A penguin was teaching Dasher how to run, jump and slide on his belly in the shallow sand.

Another was showing Dancer how to float on her back; with her long legs, it didn’t work too well.

Prancer was diving off a boat dock with a penguin buddy. Prancer is a great diver, but no one can compete with a penguin.

Vixen had a penguin on her back and they were chasing waves. The penguin kept yelling, “Ride ‘em cowboy. Woo hoo!”

Comet and his new friend were rolling down sand dunes. The penguin was doing an excellent job with his roly-poly body.

Cupid and Donner were playing Frisbee with two penguins. The penguins were surprisingly good with their short flipper arms.

As Blitzen was watching his friends play, a penguin waddled over to him.

“You must be Blitzen. Your friends told us about you. Want to learn how to surf?”

“Surf? With a penguin? Wow, this is the best vacation ever invented,” said Blitzen.

When Blitzen stood up on his surfboard, all of his friends cried out, “Yey, Blitzen! Hanging four!”

So next time you go to a beach, be on the lookout for reindeer and penguins. Because who knows where they will vacation next.